ever_neutral: ([borgias] c + l = chiaroscuro)

Before December spamming starts I thought I might as well vent/scream about The Heirs of Slytherin. Spoilers up to/including ep 16.


So… I am not sure what to think about this show right now because I feel like it's taken a weird shift from being a super cynical teen show about class and power to being THE IMPOSSIBLE AND UNIRONICALLY MELODRAMATIC LOVE STORY OF CHA EUN SANG AND KIM TAN and as we all know that is literally my least favourite thing about this show, ASK ME HOW.


… In fact, I will tell you how. I genuinely could not anti-ship this harder if I tried. Like, how do I begin to count the ways in which Tan is a controlling af asswipe who does nothing for Eun Sang? In this episode alone he repeatedly dragged her around like a rag doll, invaded and destroyed her personal belongings, ordered Young Do to babysit her as though she wasn't right there, lectured her about following his wishes, and threatened violence if she didn't comply. And one of the instances of manhandling comprised of him pulling her into a dark closet in order to initiate a kiss that she literally wouldn't be able to refuse.

Speaking of which, were we actually supposed to find that sexy?

Because.

THE MIND, IT BOGGLES.

Even if you disregard the part where Lee Min Ho and Park Shin Hye have negative sexual chemistry. it is really intensely uncomfortable to me that there have been several Eun Sang/Tan kissing scenes now and zero of them have been initiated by Eun Sang. Never mind the fact that she has not been A PARTICIPANT in most.

But of all the things that bother me about this ship, arguably the most worthy of rage is the fact that Eun Sang's story now revolves completely around Kim Tan. And not in the way that Tan's life revolves around Eun Sang because she is ~all he has, &c. &c. Tan still gets to have a storyline about his angsty family relations and illegitimacy inferiority, blah blah blah nocurr. Whereas everything about Eun Sang's character that is not directly about Tan, e.g. her goal to get through school and get better opportunities, her relationship with her mother, her other friendships, etc. have all been relegated to the background in favour of the OTP of DOOM.

And now we have hit the part of the drama where melodramatic obstacles have been contrived to tragically separate the star-crossed lovers. Ergo, I've been forced to conclude that this has been meant to be a straight romance all along. Although again, THE MIND, IT BOGGLES, supposedly all of Tan's shitty behaviour has just been a part of THEY DON'T WRITE SONGS ABOUT THE ONES THAT COME EASY and the show has no plans to address how problematic this relationship is. At best, the separation might force both of them to grow up and then maybe reunite in a less fucked up fashion but at this point IDGAF. It is seriously such a shame that the single WORST thing about this show is its central storyline.


Okay, enough about the NOtp.

MOVING ON TO BETTER THINGS:




Myung Soo and Young Do remain the most functional relationship on this show. I have nothing further to say on this matter.


SPEAKING OF BFFS.






God is real tbh. I have been anticipating this surprise friendship since like episode 5 and the show has not let me down. YOU GUYS. HE ORDERED LIKE 200 POUNDS OF SOY MILK WITH WHICH TO VANDALISE THEIR PEERS' LOCKERS AS REVENGE FOR THEM HARASSING HER. THEIR BROMANCE WILL GO ON.


I'm glad too that Tan and Young Do are bros again because my heart is soft in this way. And because it leads to hilar sequences such as Kim Woo Bin acting as Young Do pretending to be Tan pretending to be Young Do in a plot to break Tan out of house arrest. Ah, this show.


On the topic of this show giving me everything I want.




MY ENTIRE LIFE I HAVE WAITED FOR THIS MOMENT. (LIZZIE, WHERE ARE YOU.)

Obviously I ship Rachel/happiness, so even though I will always have a soft spot for Rachel/Young Do for reasons of sex, I am rooting for a Hyo Shin/Rachel endgame at the end of the day. Also, they hit all my kinks super hard. Initiating a first kiss as part of a plot to make other people jealous?? "I HAVE NO FEELINGS TOWARDS YOU"/"I HAVE NO FEELINGS TOWARDS YOU EITHER"??? Show, you know where I am most weak.


Ahem. Speaking of my weaknesses. This


[source]


was a motherfucking beautiful scene. Like, you don't understand. After seeing the episode I'd be walking around doing random things, and then I'd suddenly remember this scene, and I'd hunch over and grab my stomach and let out weird moans of anguished ecstasy and my cat would look highly alarmed, THAT IS HOW GOOD THIS SCENE WAS.

I may or may not have let out a particularly embarrassing punched-in-gut sound at "I'm just someone passing by" because goddamn if that doesn't get at the core of life and the world tbh.

... Existential brooding notwithstanding, this scene also encapsulated why this ship has worked so well for me from day one in that it is basically the perfect anti-romance narrative?? imo they've done something that's pretty subversive in light of the Boys Over Flowers model of romance that is apparently the kdrama ideal, i.e. Mean Boy who reinvents himself with redemption fantasy woman (… which, ironically, also describes Eun Sang/Tan). Because Young Do is not allowed to get what he wants.

More than that, the show actually straight up said it is his own fault, which is kind of incredible next to the popularity of "romantic heroes" like Gu Jun Pyo, etc. They straight up said that bad treatment =/= romance. (Don't ask me then why it insists on pushing Tan as a romantic hero.) Young Do literally asking for a do-over and being denied it was meta in the best way imaginable. There are no do-overs, actions have consequences, and he is a fuck up who has blocked his own shot and his heart is breaking outside a damn convenience store and I just want to smash through a window because IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.

... So, even though there is a thirsty part of me that is secretly hoping that Eun Sang getting all flustered while touching Young Do on his motorcycle means they will fit in some time in the last few eps to ferociously bang (because HOW COULD YOU WASTE THAT CHEMISTRY)… it also just seems right to me that it really was just never going to happen, and that was the point.

ALSO, KIM WOOBIN IS THE BIGGEST DICK THAT EVER DICKED. I HAVE BEEN EXPERIENCING AN EMOTIONAL STOMACHACHE SINCE YESTERDAY BECAUSE OF HIS FACE??? WHAT THE FUCK.


Btw, I've decided that this song that's always playing during Eun Sang/Young Do scenes is the only tolerable one on this OST. It's called "Growing Pains", which is both DEPRESSING AND PERFECT.


/rolling in the deep


Other things that are gr8:

  • Eun Sang's mother/Tan's mother is the true OTP.

  • There has been tragically little Bonsang in recent times but nonetheless they also remain the true OTP.

  • Bo Na/Chan Young are the most shippable established ship in existence. I'm constantly in shock about how much I enjoy them considering the pulsing mass of hate and rage that lies in place of my heart tbh.

  • lol baby!Chan Young.

  • Kim Woo Bin is a motherfucking beautiful male specimen. I have said it before and will say it again. I literally don't comprehend how anyone could find Lee Min Ho more attractive in this. But then, I am hilariously biased.


GTFO:

  • Won is my enemy and needs to die. Seriously WTAF is wrong with both the Kim brothers and their delusion that their gfs = their property. Hyun Joo/Won is second only to Eun Sang/Tan on the list of violent anti-ships on this show.

  • Speaking of which, the writers are clearly paralleling the two relationships but I have no idea what purpose that's supposed to have. Can't Tan's horde of ugly sweaters combine their forces to eat the both of them, I ask you.



To conclude:



There are no words.


All screencaps found here.


P.S. Y'all should check out the new comm Eleonore has just put up for the show, known as [livejournal.com profile] heirsofsweaters (indeed). The first post is a hoot. ;)

\o/

Nov. 19th, 2013 10:50 pm
ever_neutral: ([exo] xoxo)
WHAT UP, BROS.

+ Today/yesterday I submitted my final massive boring 35 page report required for the completion of my degree. \o/ Ergo, I will now be more alive. \o/ (Or, you know, /o\ depending on your view.) I'm pretty sure I missed a ton of things while in the depths of my final papers, so if you think there's something of yours I should be commenting on then drop me a link.


+ Chilling with my dearest mother watching The Heirs and suddenly in the middle of the episode she's like, "IF I~ WERE PARK SHIN HYE I WOULD TAP THAT [Kim Woo Bin] AND LEAVE LEE MINHO TO BE FOREVER ALONE WITH HIS UGLY SWEATERS." Ah, the indefatigable wisdom of mothers. Not that she's wrong, mind you (my favourite is the one that makes him look like a "wall with antique pictures hanging from it", personally).

So yeah, on account of said 35 page report eating my brains, this is not going to be an especially coherent post. Nonetheless, let us gather round and discuss the latest offerings.


+ First of all, I am aware that fandom is positively leaping to diss the teen trash that is this show and therefore, as a wise friend once put it, win at Not Liking The Problematic Thing and Being Too Good For This Genre. But tbqh this show is (near) perfect 2 me. Sorry not sorry but watching attractive miserable people make each other miserable is my way of life. It is what it is, friends. Therefore, unpopular opinions abound.


+ So bored of everyone bitching about Eun Sang's "passivity". If this is actually a "feminist" complaint you have about the show then I would seriously question your supposed understanding of justice. And direct you to this post. Which is actually about Sansa Stark, but same principle applies. Heroines do not owe it to you to be empowered. Especially when they are underprivileged and lower-class and vulnerable to abuse from people much more powerful than they are. The fact that this show stresses Eun Sang and her mother's situation so much is a point in its favour, not yours. Please to be taking your thinly veiled Strong Female Character (TM) misogyny and choking on it.


+ Tan and Young Do's pissing contest is endlessly entertaining to me ngl. Firstly, their man love clearly will go on. Even my mother agrees. ("I think they're secretly attracted to each other and using Park Shin Hye as a proxy.")

Secondly, it is pretty obvious they're making Eun Sang a pawn in their personal war, ergo the aggressive triangularity is a power struggle. Not romance. So long as one keeps this in mind I'm convinced the "romantic" plots become 95% more enjoyable. And lbr the drawn-out sequences in which the three stare at one another with simultaneously enraged and aroused expressions while a dramatic score plays is the highlight of each episode, don't even front like you disagree.


+ Hyo Shin needs his own spinoff, stat.


[X]

Enough said.


+ lol Eun Sang/Tan. Okay, so there are some small things I like. Firstly, that Eun Sang said the setting of their "date" on camp reminded her of Friday the 13th. And then later (obliquely) referred to their relationship as a "horror love story". Ha ha. And despite the fact that I cannot comprehend why anyone would want to date Kim Tan, I think it made sense for Eun Sang to consciously decide to let herself go along with the fantasy since they were far away from home. The whole "dreamcatcher" theme of their relationship is vv consistent. And when Young Do taunted that Tan's only going to ditch her in the end, Eun Sang was literally like, "bitch, I know." THAT'S interesting.

HAVING SAID THAT... this ship is just flat out boring me to death. Imma quote Zoe on this because her words are a balm to the soul tbh:




"I'M NOT GOING TO WRONG!SHIP A BORING SHIP, THAT IS JUST ANTITHETICAL TO MY IDEA OF WRONG!SHIPPING AS A WHOLE. I wrong!ship stuff that I can tell is wrong (and hopefully the narrative can too) but it's just so good and/or hitting my ship kinks that I don't even care and can't even help it. But I'm not going to go out of my way to wrong!ship something, THAT IS AN OXYMORON."




Indeed. I mean, WTAF was the ending of ep 12?? nhf the two of them staring at each other for five minutes while Lee Min Ho does some weird gasping thing to convey the depth of his emotions. I would rather take the aggressive triangularity, thx.

Also, gdi, Park Shin Hye and Lee Min Ho have negative chemistry. It is genuinely baffling considering their faces but there it is. At this point I just wish the show would cut 90% of their scenes so that this show could be ACTUALLY perfect.


+ The entirety of the pool scene. Only this show, man. Plus, it brought us this. Amen.


+ I love how Young Do complimenting Hyo Shin's angry!voice is now a thing, LMFAO????? Like, "Sunbae, the voice you use when threatening me... is really nice". I mean, yes good, more Hyo Shin worship. Also they should bang. But I am generally of the opinion that Hyo Shin should bang the universe.


+ BONSANG IS REAL. I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THEM HAVING SLEEPOVERS AND HOLDING HANDS ABOUT THEIR GAY LOVE?


+ Still shipping Rachel/Young Do tbqh. I mean, "Normally when two people become siblings they fall in love"/"Now I'm thinking that's the solution to breaking up this marriage"????? YOU DON'T JUST PUT THAT IN FRONT OF ME AND EXPECT ME NOT TO SHIP IT. LIKE.


+ Myung Soo is the most hilarious. I'm convinced that Myung Soo/Young Do along with Bo Na/Eun Sang are basically the most functional relationships on this show, L M A O.


+ Still nocurr whatsoever for Won. Why is he still a character.


+ I resent so much that Eun Sang/Young Do are hitting all my ship kinks but dammit THEY ARE HITTING ALL MY SHIP KINKS???? Like

[X]

Plus, he tossed his classmates' shoes in a bucket of cold water as "revenge" for them talking smack about Eun Sang. And she offered sympathy about his bad family news in the form of "I'll postpone my revenge on you." Like. I am not made of fuckin' stone, people. It is Park Shin Hye and Kim Woo Bin, for the love of Satan.

(I also have a lot of complicated feelings about how they are actually considerably less problematic than Eun Sang/Tan by sheer virtue of the fact that Young Do has zero emotional power in their dynamic. As I said to Zoe: The way the show set up Young Do from the beginning established that Eun-sang owes him nothing - because she was given full license to hate him. (Whereas, Eun-sang/Tan STARTED with her being in his debt. And he has continued to take advantage of that.) I mean, besides the fact that All Girls Want Bad Boys and I only ship it because I want to ride Kim Woo Bin's dick, &c. &c., the power dynamic is just a thousand times more appealing.)

Also, I've decided that they should be BFFs on the basis of their mutual ramyeon noodle appreciation. Bring on the bromance, yo.


+ To conclude:

[X]


ever_neutral: ([dw] amy + tardis = runaway)
I still have a ton of trick or treats to answer to, but let me take a sec to direct y'all to Kelsey's Lady-Love Fest.

Go, prompt, write, cry.

Also, all my Heirs people should read this and join me in my fury at K's general existence and ways.

Bye.
ever_neutral: ([elem] joan + sherlock = in progress)

I haven’t posted in so long that I’m sure some of you have assumed I’ve died. Indeed this is about what has happened. Death by final papers. Ah, academia. But in happier news I am on the homestretch, ergo post.

i.  Eleonore and I are making way on an evil plot to induct Lizzie into the SHINee world. Thus, we have carefully compiled an evil intro playlist* designed to wreak havoc and appease the dark lord &c. &c. (Note to certain flisters: Don’t even think about arguing over song choices yo, y’all know “Dazzling Girl” is secretly their best song.) fyi I've used music videos where applicable on account of the fact that SHINee has some truly terriblemazing MVs that frankly must be seen for oneself. The "best" is probably the one for "Lucifer" (the first one). The more you see it the less sense it makes. Why does it play like a musical car commercial. WTH are those wispy patronus things about? Are they supposed to represent the devil possessing them (to dance complicatedly in front of a bunch of shiny cars)? We may never know. But everyone looks bangin' so who cares?

I'd also advise watching their lives because melodramatic yet technically sound belting + choreo porn ("how do they breathe" -- that too we may never know). Please follow the links and cry.

*not including the latest album as that has already been linked accordingly and produced excellent results mainly thanks to Lee Taemin’s propensity to whore around shirtless in a tacky black fur coat, Satan bless that disturbed child

ii. I have been watching The Heirs.LOVE IS THE MOMENT /cue )

iii. I want to belatedly do that Halloween Trick or Treat meme but I worry about time/responsibilities. So, I guess, comment on this post with "TRICK OR TREAT" and I will probably link you something cool but maybe with a bit of delay because the real life? Alternately, depending on who you are, I may give you a trick instead. :D

P.S. Dear Kelsey: I can't believe you sent me a Namu-shaped fridge magnet. (Btw, lol that these even exist.) I will never be able to put it up for fear of other people in the house asking if it's "one of those Korean dudes that I like who look like girls". We will not talk about the contents of your letter. NOPE.

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