Yaaaay, I'm so glad that the characterisation/voices work here. I agree, Buffy's voice is difficult to capture and I don't know too many authors who can do it. So your comment especially means a lot! Also glad that you feel that this feels "canon-compliant". I really didn't want to go too far out with it because I adore the bleakness of S6, and I figured that if ~this ever happened, it would be a rare bright spot. So, really pleased overall that it worked for you. ♥

knowing what I do about depression (going through myself) and abusive relationships I know that they are so WRONG for and to each other that season but part of my heart ached for Buffy to just be able to enjoy it, and let go of the shame.

Ditto. While their relationship was undeniably destructive, I also think it's wrong to simplify it down to Buffy making ~shameful decisions / tainting herself / whatever, because in a season where she spent every day putting on a brave face, Spike was sometimes the only person she actually felt she could be herself with. For better or worse. Judgment isn't helpful.

Thanks so much for the awesome comment. ♥