this is not about love.

[ever_neutral]

Um, I have a bunch of other top fives to finish answering, but I'm really in the mood for this one right now? (Everyone is surprised.)

for smells_corrupt :

Top Five Ships O' Dysfunction

First of all: LOL MY FAVOURITE TOPIC OF DISCUSSION IN EVER??? If you're wondering how I am defining "dysfunction", it comes down to three factors:

1) The ship constituents are terrible/fucked up/emotionally traumatised people who should be put in straitjackets/lifelong therapy.

2) The ship makes me



as often as it makes me go:



So, you know, in short: I am motivated to get out the vodka and bust out "THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE I LIKE THE WAY IT HUURRTS".

3) Being a fan of the ship causes you GRIEF in fandom. I'm talking controversy, people. I'm talking being accused of being a terrible/immoral/disgusting/rape-apologizing/adultery-condoning/whatever the fuck sort of person for being invested in it.

(Weirdly enough, all of the following ships are MASSIVELY popular. Like, probably some of the most popular ships if not THE most popular in their respective fandoms. So, either a disturbingly large percentage of people on the Internet consist of terrible people, or there's a lot of Fandom-ish Tall Poppy Syndrome going on.)

4) All of the above.

So with no further ado, let's get down. Note: The order of the following is interchangeable, except for #1 which will always out-dysfunction EVERYTHING. :))))))

#5. Logan & Veronica (Veronica Mars)



 

VERONICA: Do you think this thing... will ever get more normal?
Logan: What, like, will we ever hang at the mall and hold hands and buy each other teddy bears with hearts that say "I wuv you beary much?"
---
LOGAN: I thought our story was epic, you know, you and me.
VERONICA: Epic how?
LOGAN: Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined, bloodshed. Epic.
---
VERONICA: Come on. Ruined lives? Bloodshed? You really think a relationship should be that hard?
LOGAN: No one writes songs about the ones that come easy.
---
LOGAN: I vote for the pain now. But I'm always here if you need anything... But you never need anything."
---
LOGAN: Someone's always supposed to pay. Isn't that the rule we live by?

UGH. You know what, I am just going to link softly_me 's entire post here BECAUSE IT IS FLAWLESS UGGHHHHH. There is nothing that I could possibly add.

#4. Kara & Lee, a.k.a. Starbuck and Apollo (Battlestar Galactica)



 

KARA: You love me. You can’t take it back. There’s no take-backs.
---
LEE: Hey, what about us?
KARA: There is no us, all right? I just wanted a good lay. There is nothing here. Do you get that? Nothing.
---
LEE: Doesn't make a lot of sense, does it?
KARA: You should hear the way my brain works sometimes. [pause] Are we okay?
LEE: You have a brain?
---
LEE: Besides, I never really could say no to anything.

KARA: Except me.

LEE: Especially you.
---
LEE: 'Cause I'm Lee, and you're Kara. And the rest of it isn't worth a damn. Right?

Well, apparently I have a total "the girl and the boyfriend's brother" kink. (hold that thought.) Yes. Well. These two are motherfucking heroes who save the world on a regular basis, but they can also be complete fucking assholes who treat each other like shite and I quite honestly want to bitchslap them both a lot over the course of the show and actually they do in fact beat the crap out of each other in a boxing match one time LOLOLOL. And it tickles me to no end that on a weird sci-fi show containing fucking interspecies relationships and a whole load of FoeYay, it's these two fucked up humans that have THE MOST DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP? ROFLMAO. (Well, possibly except for Kara/Leoben. Le sigh.) So yeah basically I love my Pilots because they completely FAIL at being in a relationship, and they drag each other down and emotionally slaughter the other and pull other people into their destructive web and I kind of hate them both a lot. And then. and then. Then… they are each other's best friend in the entire world? And nothing in that crazy, fucked up world has the power to take that away from them. And I love that in this crazy post-apocalyptic universe where close to nothing survives, Kara and Lee's crazy, fucked up friendship is one of the few things to stubbornly remain to the end. oh, kids. go get some therapy.

#3. Damon & Elena (The Vampire Diaries)



 


ELENA: Some things could matter again.

DAMON: Maybe. But it seems a little unrealistic to me.
---
DAMON: None of this matters to me. None of it.
ELENA: People die around you. How could it not matter?
---
STEFAN: She considers you a friend.
DAMON: Same here. Elena's a very good friend. Actually, she might qualify as my only friend.
---
ELENA: There’s nothing good about him, Stefan. Not anymore. He’s decided what he wants. He doesn’t want to feel. He wants to be hated. It’s just easier that way.
---
DAMON: You're one to talk about giving up when all you've done is give up.
---
DAMON: You should have met me in 1864. You would have liked me.
ELENA: I like you now. Just the way you are.
DAMON: … Thank you.
ELENA: You're welcome.

LOL. As previously discussed. Yes, these two make the list because TVD fandom has officially become BtVS fandom 2.0, complete with "rapist-lover" accusations and everything. Fun times. And typically, because I am a deeply corrupt person, the more moral indignation there is, the more attached to these two I become. WHOOPS. I regret nothing.

So yeah, I now refer to these two as my mutual death-wish ship, lol. *pets them both* Even ignoring both their suicidal tendencies, the fucked-up-ness is pretty evident with one of them being a self-serving psychopath who has ruined the other's life six ways to Sunday, etc. etc. (Though I also love those weird moments where Elena is the one being manipulative and using Damon's tactics against him, like that time she passionately made out with Stefan deliberately in front of Damon LOL like whose benefit was that for, Elena? Not your boyfriend's.) These two will never be endgame by any stretch of the imagination--contrary to the belief of a lot of shippers who seem convinced that they will be because their story is so ~epic~ etcetera--but I swear to God, it doesn't even matter, because it's not about the destination, I like the way it hurts, etc etc.. In all seriousness: this is not really a romance. More than anything, it seems to me that the crux of Damon and Elena's weird connection is over-identification. (Like when Elena screams that people die around him? OH, ELENA.) Damage is drawn to damage. And Elena's stubborn attachment to Damon is not actually that hard to figure out, because nobody is more damaged than Damon Salvatore--and Elena Gilbert is nothing if not a Fixer. Of course, the other massive component to this is the fact that she will never succeed. We talk a lot about how Damon is always in love with the unattainable, but surely this applies to Elena too? She just. can't. give up on Damon, because he is the problem she cannot solve. And on Damon's part--I've seen some ~confusion around the place about why Elena. But seriously? I point you to that third quote there. She is his first friend in 167 years. That's why. Don't be a fucking moron.

#2. Peggy & Pete (Mad Men)




 

PETE: Actually, for the first time today, I'm not selling anything… Does Peggy live here?
---
PETE: Everything's so easy for you.
PEGGY: It's not easy for anyone, Pete.
---
PETE: I've been thinking about everything that's going on. And I thought, who would care if I was gone? I mean, Trudy would care, but she doesn't know me. But you do. And I know you. And I think you're perfect.
PEGGY: I'm not perfect, Pete.
PETE: Yes, you are.
---
PEGGY: Well, one day you're there. And then all of a sudden, there's less of you. And you wonder where that part went. If it's living somewhere, outside of you. And you keep thinking, maybe you'll get it back. And then you realise, it's just gone.
---
PEGGY: It's my decision.
PETE: Your decisions affect me.
---
PEGGY: I just wanted to let you know how happy I am for you. Both.
PETE: … Thank you.

Um, these two pretty much had me from that weird, shocking moment at the end of the pilot where Peggy lets him in to her apartment. Because: she let him in. And I feel like this is astronomically huge. (See: that first quote.) Because he's drunk, and lonely, and terrified about getting married in the morning, and it was his bachelor party that night, and he's depressed like he always is, and a creep like he always is, and she lets him in. And I know that "I don't like you like this" is a moment that should totally turn me off and kill my shipper heart and make me hate Pete, but I just love them MORE for it. It is unbelievably cruel, and BRILLIANT, and I actually die a little for Pete, because he thought that she was like him -- instead, he realises that she's just going to be another person in his life who is (in his perception) happier than he is, and therefore he will always be inferior. Except somewhere along the way, he recognises that her being above him isn't so bad, and that he loves her for it, but it's too late, Pete. You fucked your chances up, just like you always do. And I don't know if I can say that Peggy was really truly in love with Pete that first season, but she FELT (and feels?) for him, on a level that she just hasn't been able to for anyone since. I mean, he was the first heartbreak. He killed her innocence. And she thought that maybe, one day, she'd get it back. But it's just gone. And since they are so similar, and took turns to completely annihilate the other, because of course, their timing is ALL WRONG, and I love them for it--and as much as I now find Pete/Trudy thoroughly endearing and right--there will always be this stubborn, heartbroken part of me that watches Pete and Peggy and thinks "BUT ZOMG THEY'RE THE ONLY PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER!!!11!!1" I want it so bad, you guys. It will never be. A doomed shipper leads a life of pain.

#1. Buffy & Spike (BtVS)

SPIKE: It won't hurt a bit.
BUFFY: No, Spike. It's gonna hurt a lot.
---
BUFFY: And I can fool Giles, and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason.
---
BUFFY: You think we're dancing?
SPIKE: That's all we've ever done.
---
SPIKE: It's not pretty, but it's real.
---
BUFFY: That was real.
---
BUFFY: I can be alone with you here.
---
BUFFY: Why are you always around when I'm miserable?
SPIKE: 'Cause that's when you're alone.
---
SPIKE: Oh, poor little lost girl. She doesn't fit in anywhere. She's got no one to love.

BUFFY: Me? I'm lost? Look at you, you idiot! Poor Spikey. Can't be a human, can't be a vampire. Where the hell do you fit in?
---
SPIKE: But it hurts?
BUFFY: Yeah.
---
SPIKE: What does that mean, exactly?
BUFFY: I don't know. Does it have to mean something?

/using the most hated quote from non-Buffy stans
/loving it
/regretting nothing


Because duh.

If you're questioning this choice…. I question your questioning.

No really. Do you even go here?

...


In related news, I'm stealing this meme by stainofmylove : 

Name a couple (or two, or whatever, there ain't no meme police) and I will tell you the exact moment I started shipping them. Or stopped.

Comments

warning for: gratuitous overuse of capitalization

[penny-lane-42.livejournal.com]

I LOVE YOU SO HARD. LIKE I THINK I MIGHT EXPLODE WITH LOOOOOVE.

This absolute consistency of yours makes me flail all over the place. LOGAN AND VERONICA AND MUTUAL DESTRUCTION!!!!!

I always felt like I should ship Lee/Kara because everybody else ships it so hard, but I just kind of don't? I just don't really care about either of them? And I'm a big fan of Sam, for some reason. However, on an intellectual level, I appreciate their construction and such. And I love how much you love them. So.

OH HEY REMEMBER HOW I'M CONSTANTLY DEFENDING DAMON/ELENA EVEN THOUGH I REALLY DON'T SHIP IT ANYMORE? I amuse myself. Carry on with your shipping. I love the way you ship them.

Pete and Peggy are SO MESSED UP GLORIOUSLY. I'm so behind on that show/maybe have given up on it because watching it feels more like homework than fun now? However, this:

"BUT ZOMG THEY'RE THE ONLY PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER!!!11!!1"

UM, YES. I have always felt this way about those two. Wow.

I can be alone with you here.


I think I might be the only person alive who thinks that this is far and away THE MOST ROMANTIC thing I have ever heard in my life. WHAT DOES THIS SAY ABOUT ME?????? I don't even know. All I know is that Buffy and Spike are my flawless ship of love.

Speaking of them, tell me the EXACT MOMENT you started shipping them.

Re: warning for: gratuitous overuse of capitalization

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Haha, I love that you love my love for ships you don't ship. That's true friendship, yo. XD

UM, YES. I have always felt this way about those two. Wow.

*high fives forever*

I think I might be the only person alive who thinks that this is far and away THE MOST ROMANTIC thing I have ever heard in my life. WHAT DOES THIS SAY ABOUT ME??????

UM, HELLO. DON'T EVEN. NO SHAME.

hahaha when did I ship... WHEN DID I NOT SHIP IT. Well, before I even started watching possibly? I vaguely knew about B/A and S/B and I figured I would lurve B/A because everyone loves it? But then I kept seeing snippets of the later seasons on TV and being totally intrigued by Spike and Buffy and their disgusting chemistry. So then I rented all the DVDs and um, I kind of shipped it from the beginning because the construction was fab, and then there was THAT scene in "Out of My Mind" and I was like:

IT HAS ARRIVED.

AND THEN THERE WAS 'FOOL FOR LOVE'. AND THE BACK PORCH. And I was gone. Goner. Life ruined. Never looked back.

[mollivanders.livejournal.com]

LEE: 'Cause I'm Lee, and you're Kara. And the rest of it isn't worth a damn. Right?

Cue me bawling internally. That scene is just gut-wrenching and the way he just stands with her and tells her nothing else matters except that she's here...oh, ship of my heart.

I don't have words for what that last Peggy/Pete scene did to me. Honestly. I don't. I basically was with Peggy every step of the way - strong when she was strong, weak when she was weak, crying by herself by myself and then pulling herself back together for that final moment.

In all of these ships, it's not so much about endgame (a flawed concept if there ever was one and one which makes me rage against the dying of the light) but about the journey. The construction. The surviving. Just give it a rest, fandom, and let it be.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

RIGHT? Hands down, it is one of the loveliest non-romantic moments of the series.

In all of these ships, it's not so much about endgame (a flawed concept if there ever was one and one which makes me rage against the dying of the light) but about the journey.

PREACH.

[earnmysong.livejournal.com]

May I just say that I ADORE your definition of a dysfunctional ship in its entirety? Because it encompasses all the reasons I ship Damon/Elena. And Logan/Veronica.

Never really shipped Spike/Buffy, but I understood the motivation behind it. Your quotes demonstrate that perfectly!

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Awww, glad you enjoyed my ramblings, lol. <3

[next_to_normal]

And typically, because I am a deeply corrupt person, the more moral indignation there is, the more attached to these two I become. WHOOPS.

Your deeply corrupt contrarianism inspires me. Flawless choices are flawless. Even the ones I don't actually ship (Kara/Lee and Pete/Peggy), I am still inordinately fascinated by their dysfunction.

And on Damon's part--I've seen some ~confusion around the place about why Elena. But seriously? I point you to that third quote there. She is his first friend in 167 years. That's why. Don't be a fucking moron.

Hahahahaha ilu bb. Also, I spent way too much time reading D/E fic last night. Your recs will be my DOWNFALL.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

<3333333

I am an inspiration to contrarians everywhere. Let this be known.

Also, I spent way too much time reading D/E fic last night. Your recs will be my DOWNFALL.

[gryfndor-godess.livejournal.com]

Xander/Anya!

Fred/Wes...did you ever think they had potential and were subsequently disillusioned, or were you ambivalent/opposed from the get-go?

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Haha, I do not really ship-ship X/A in my usual passionate way, but I loved them pretty much from that scene in S3 where Anya VERY SMOOTHLY asks Xander to take her to prom. Adorable and weird. Sold.

Re: Fred/Wes--the former. Well, both. When Wes starts to become interested in Fred, it's very WTF. But then there was that last scene in "Billy"--and this is just after Wes has terrified the living daylights out of Fred--and she comes to make sure HE'S okay? That was honestly very moving, and I thought we were going to get MORE of that. Also, Amy and Alexis are honestly the best actors on the show? And Fred and Wesley individually are the two most complex/interesting supporting characters, so you know, it could actually have been a really interesting ship. I thought that it was gonna be one of those ships with parallel character arcs, which told us MORE about each character as their arcs intertwined. Does that make sense? All the set-up was there. I was never counting on Fred falling into Wesley's arms at the end of it. That... shouldn't have happened. Wesley's doomed obsession should have remained unrequited. It should have been a tragic ship because it highlighted all the TRAGEDY of the individual characters--NOT because they never got to have a happy ending. (I mean, this is AtS, jfc.)

But, you know, aside from pocochina, I am the ONLY ONE who feels this way, lol. Though, to tell the truth, I'm not too cut up about it since, you know, I get Wes/Illyria. Which got a better construction in like, six episodes than Fred/Wes did in three seasons, so.

re: Shipping the dysfunctional ones

[lutamira]

So now I am super-curious: Did you ever ship Ellen/Saul on BSG? Or what were your feelings toward that relationship generally? Did it hit your dysfunction kinks? If not, why do you think it didn't? And MEME it: if you ever did ship them/stop shipping them, when and why and how?

Re: Shipping the dysfunctional ones

[ceciliaj.livejournal.com]

Awesome q! I love Ellen!

[ceciliaj.livejournal.com]

NO TAKEBACKS! ILU

also PLEASE watch the rest of Six Feet Under someday. I think you will looooove it.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

♥

UGGGHHHH I WILL. ONE DAY. ONE DAY.

[blackfrancine.livejournal.com]

GAH. My heart has grown a bulge in it!Your Buffy/Spike quotes fill me with love!!! Up to and including "Does it have to mean something." You and I will always have each other--the only two people in the world who appreciate that line. NEVER APOLOGIZE.

I swear--when I get done rewatching Buffy and AtS, I'm going to start back in on BSG. I need another dysfunctional ship in my life.

Also--word on Pete/Peggy. I LOVE how the two of the them just need acceptance so badly at the beginning of the series--and they can only find it with each other. And Gah! Pete's "I don't like you like this" line is so horrible--but so perfect. Oh my gosh, I love when those two are cruel to each other.

ETA: For the meme, how about Darla/Angel.

[local-max.livejournal.com]

Don't tell Maggie, but I love the "Does it have to mean something" line pretty hard too. (Or tell Maggie, whatever, but she is definitely one of the people who -- understandably -- is not heartwarmed by that line. Which I think means she's a more stable person emotionally than I!!! No comment on your or Neutral, though, I don't want to make calls on your emotional stabilities.)

[pocochina.livejournal.com]

Lives ruined, bloodshed. Epic.

OH LOGAN ECHOLLS. so dramatic and arrogant and adorably teenaged. I love it.

your Peggy/Pete minifesto is perfect. I feel like I get Pete better now after reading it.

I can be alone with you here.

oh, I love that line.

in conclusion:

oh, kids. go get some therapy.

word.

I wish to be predictable. Talk to me about Wes/Faith!

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Aww, I'm glad I ~enlightened Pete Campbell for you, lolol. He's very transparent to me.

WES/FAITH! HAHAHA um, the "Five By Five" torture scene? I seriously thought they were gonna start making out. IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN ANY MINUTE I SWEAR. Inappropriately hot. And then their camaraderie in S4 basically sealed the deal. Their construction--SO GOOD. SO. GOOD. and you know what, I am honestly outraged that I was cheated out of an Eliza D./Alexis D. hook-up on TWO DIFFERENT SHOWS. IT ALMOST HAPPENED TWICE. FFFFFFF-

[spuffy-noelle.livejournal.com]

How about:

SPIKE: I may be dirt ... but you're the one who likes to roll in it, Slayer. You never had it so good as me. Never.
BUFFY: Uhh, you're bent.
SPIKE: Yeah, and it made you scream, didn't it?

So dysFUNctional! But I too am one of the terrible people who OPENLY love Spuffy dysfunction!!!

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Hahaha I was totally about to put that quote in there, but then I didn't for some reason. It is pretty quality dysfunction, isn't it? *draws hearts and flowers*

[smells_corrupt.livejournal.com]

WHY IS DYSFUNCTION SO AMAZING?! And more importantly, WHY DO PEOPLE OCCASIONALLY WORRY FOR MY SANITY AFTER I BLEED DYSFUNCTION LOVE ALL OVER THEM?

Please excuse the capslock of glee, it's just EVERYTHING YOU SAID! ALL OF IT!

Ahem. Yes. On to specifics. Logan/Veronica. They own a little piece of my soul. They are so beautifully, wonderfully, painfully fucked up; but they work! I don't get to rant and rave about them nearly enough, so in the interest of not writing a novel-length comment, I'm going to stop myself here. I have yet to find a ship that beats out spuffy in dysfunction or my subsequent adoration, but LoVe is a very close second.

Speaking of Spuffy, this would be the place of another novel, so I have to stop myself again, but in regards to the quotes you list, yes! Those are all such fantastic examples of why I ship them so. hard. Especially the School Hard quote. That one kills me. Oh Buffy. You have no idea. Also this one:
BUFFY: last night was the most perverse degrading experience of my life!
SPIKE: yeah. me too.
BUFFY: that might be how you get off but it's not my style
SPIKE: no, it's your calling. Gave me a run for my money, Slayer. Now I admit it. You've had me by the shorthairs. I love you, you know it, but I got my rocks back last night. You felt something.
BUFFY: Not love
SPIKE: not yet. But I'm in your system now. You're gonna crave me like I crave blood.

Tell me about Logan/Veronica! And I'm taking this meme.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

WHY DO PEOPLE OCCASIONALLY WORRY FOR MY SANITY AFTER I BLEED DYSFUNCTION LOVE ALL OVER THEM?

lol, the entire story of my life.

♥

UGGHHHH SO MANY GOOD S/B QUOTES. I really had to restrain myself with this post, truly.

LOGAN AND VERONICA. Um, I pretty much knew going in that I was gonna ship them like whoa. So, it is not actually a case of WHEN did I ship them, but when did I NOT, lol. Them teaming up to "find Logan's mother" in S1 was the clincher. Like, the exact moment Logan turned up at Veronica's doorstep to ask for her help. And then, of course, the rest was history. :)

[local-max.livejournal.com]

THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU AND DOING THIS

I am not so much of a shipper at heart -- but the ones that I do go for most are the dysfunctional ones. K/L is something that I have trouble with only insofar as it became more of a ship around when the show started to lose itself. But, um, I actually do quite like "Unfinished Business," which I gather is a love-it-or-hate-it (or, sometimes, a love-it-and-hate-it) so there we go. And obviously I am a Spuffy, LoVe and...Peteggy, Peggete, Campson, Olbell?

[local-max.livejournal.com]

OK, favourite Don Draper relationship (non-romantic counts if you want -- I'd say Don/Peggy is the best Don relationship on the show but I will get violent if it ever goes romantic). Go.

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

Dominic/DeWitt. (Also, I adored reading your thoughts on screwed-up ships. YAY!)

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

YAY! ♥

DOM/DEWITT! Ummmm... haha, I got a ~vibe off them from the beginning when they were, you know... walking down hallways together. Inappropriately hot. yes. But "A Spy In The House of Love" was the clincher--"That would imply that I'd lost something"? OH, ADELLE. And their whole confrontation with Dom in the chair and just. I got verklempt. Yep.

[eilowyn.livejournal.com]

You know I would love this post. Just sayin'. I was reading this on my iPhone while getting blood drawn so that I could ignore the fact that I was getting blood drawn and I started LOLing at your definition of dysfunctional relationships and the nurse got mad at me because I wasn't holding still. True story.

So, you know, in short: I am motivated to get out the vodka and bust out "THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE I LIKE THE WAY IT HUURRTS".


LOLING LIKE IT'S NOBODY'S BUSINESS!

The only one I don't really ship is Pete/Peggy (insert Jeff/Annie there and you totally have my list), but you're SO CONVINCING that I totally see it.

Anyway, for the new meme, I wanna know exactly when you started shipping Kara/Lee!

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

LOL. AWESOME STORY, BRO. I feel significantly more accomplished now, funnily enough.

Haha, I don't really see J/A as dysfunctional? (I'd say Jeff/Britta on the whole is more dysfunctional, actually.) But, I am way behind on Community so who knows what excellent dysfunction I've been missing.

PILOTS! LOL, I was talked into shipping them by a friend before I started watching the show. But truthfully, I did not really become truly invested in them until S2. The "no take-backs" scene. ADORABLE VOMIT. That episode is just a great example of why my pilots are brOTP.

[agnes-bean.livejournal.com]

I love your brain. Seriously, I was nodding along to EVERYTHING in this post. You've captured why I love these kinds of relationships, AND you've picked some of my favorites. I think I would make almost the exact same list (Damon & Elena would probably be replaced by the vampire/non-vamp ship in my icon instead, but I'm sure I would love them if I watched Vampire Diaries, so).

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

♥

I am incredibly behind on Being Human, so cannot comment on Annie/Mitchell yet. I hear they're contentious. *strokes chin*

[bluesuzanne.livejournal.com]

AE;AKFFHJJJJFKJHHHHHHDAS;..

Out of curiosity, what's the most hated quote in the Buffy/Spike section???

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

DSLFJASL;DFJDSLKJFSD

That would be "Does it have to mean something?" Apparently it's very offensive. People totally think Buffy's being a huge bitch there. Meh.

[silverusagi]

Meme! Dean and Castiel, of course.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

OH, MAN. That's tricky. I was ~intrigued by them all through S4, but it was THIS moment at the start of S5:

"I did it--all of it--for you."

ALSDFJDSKAL;FDLKFJSDA;KLFJLASDKJFSLSDLDJFADKLS;FJDKLS;JF

That was it, yo.

[agnes-bean.livejournal.com]

Also, I forgot the meme part of this!

*goes to look at your profile and find something I don't know your thoughts on*

Nathan/Kelly!

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Haha, from the BEGINNING? Particularly that weird moment in the pilot where Kelly's all up in Nathan's face being panicked and Nathan thinks, "I would! I would definitely shag her!!"--which is seriously THE MOST inappropriate thing to be thinking at that precise moment, and Kelly's like WTF man, and it was hilarious. And then my shippiness was confirmed by them becoming weird friends in the following episodes. :)

[stainofmylove.livejournal.com]

Yesssss. A++ post, lol. There isn't a ton to add, but just want to echo your squee over the epic (sorta functional) dysfunction that is Logan/Veronica, Damon/Elena, and Buffy/Spike. Not really Kara/Lee fan (too busy shippin' Kara/Leoben to the end, lol)--but you're so right, they definitely have a solid place among these couples.


As for el meme: Cook/Effy and Damon/Katherine, please? <3

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

LOL, I SHIP KARA/LEOBEN SO HARD. NOBODY ELSE UNDERSTANDS.

Ah, Cook/Effy--OK, you know what, I was a late convert. I was not sure if I shipped them or not in S3, but the moment that DID IT for me was in Cook's episode in S4, where Effy comes to visit him in jail, and tells him, "That's what I've always loved about you, Cook. You're brave." JUST. HOW COULD I NOT. ASLKFJSADLKFD

DAMON/KATHERINE. Oh, man. I think, like you, it was that blood-kiss at the start of "Children of the Damned". Yeah... I was very easily sold on those two, lol. Like, I remember NOT wanting to ship Stefan/Katherine because I was so attached to D/K already, hahaha...

[softly-me.livejournal.com]

*is terribly flattered* Especially because I think that L/V post is one of my more inadequate ones. UGH THEY ARE BOTH SO PERFECT AND SO DAMAGED AT THE SAME TIME AND I CAN NEVER PROPERLY EXPLAIN! Life-ruiners. But, anyway, all-time OTP, so I must bear it.

Anyway, ALL OF YOUR THOUGHTS ARE WONDERFUL

So yeah basically I love my Pilots because they completely FAIL at being in a relationship, and they drag each other down and emotionally slaughter the other and pull other people into their destructive web and I kind of hate them both a lot.

Because this is the most wonderful description of Kara/Lee and I do not understaaand how you did it in only one sentence. That is everything that they are!!!

Like when Elena screams that people die around him? OH, ELENA.

Ahhhhh!!! I just want to hold Elena forever and protect her from the world, I can't even. Also, all of your other thoughts are correct and thought-provoking.

And your Pete/Peggy explanation is exactly why I love you! You just listed all the reasons that I do not ship them, but generally appreciate how terrible/heartbreaking they are. It's like... I just want them to be happy with other people and I'm not sure they ever will be, but I know they'll be more miserable with each other. Gah! I dunno. These two always confuse my feelings.

Aaand, Buffy/Spike. Obviously. Nothing needs to be said.

In conclusion: YES

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

WHAAAAAT IS IS TOTALLY ADEQUATE HOLD THE FUCK UP. lol. And yes. We bear it. *solemn nod*

ALL YOUR COMMENTS ARE WONDERFUL. <3333

Because this is the most wonderful description of Kara/Lee and I do not understaaand how you did it in only one sentence.

HAHAHA TY I TRY! Let's be real here--they make you work for it. *rolls eyes* *squishes them*

You just listed all the reasons that I do not ship them, but generally appreciate how terrible/heartbreaking they are. It's like... I just want them to be happy with other people and I'm not sure they ever will be, but I know they'll be more miserable with each other. Gah! I dunno. These two always confuse my feelings.

Indeed. *strokes chin glumly* I can sort of imagine them in some ~alternate dimension being happy together, lol. And I really do appreciate how happy Pete and Trudy are together now--I actually feel like Pete has a way better chance at this long-term happiness thing than Peggy does. I just can't imagine her letting anyone get that close again, because of that trauma. :(((((

Anyhoo, I'm glad you enjoyed my crazy ramblings! ALWAYS A PLEASURE. :D

[angearia.livejournal.com]

FLAWLESS EXCELLENT YES YES YES

So after spilling feelings all throughout your comments, I thought I'd be short and sweet (aren't I always!):

~John/Cameron~

(Have you watched Terminator: the Sarah Connor Chronicles? Because if not, you should! But if you have, tell me ~things~)

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

THANK YOU THANK YOU I AM HERE ALL WEEK. ♥

Have you watched Terminator: the Sarah Connor Chronicles?

OMGGGG Emmie I have not, and I need to do so. Shameful. I already know John/Cameron will be my thing, lolol. Do not worry.

[verdant_fire]

(Weirdly enough, all of the following ships are MASSIVELY popular. Like, probably some of the most popular ships if not THE most popular in their respective fandoms. So, either a disturbingly large percentage of people on the Internet consist of terrible people, or there's a lot of Fandom-ish Tall Poppy Syndrome going on.)

RIGHT? Thank you for pointing this out. Also, the term Tall Poppy Syndrome pleases me, since it is both apt and, according to Wikipedia, Australian. I shall assimilate it into my vocabulary.

ELENA: Some things could matter again.

DAMON: Maybe. But it seems a little unrealistic to me.

Which episode was this from, and how have I somehow missed it despite memorizing 95% of Damon's lines? WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY PRIORITIES? :O

Yes, these two make the list because TVD fandom has officially become BtVS fandom 2.0, complete with "rapist-lover" accusations and everything. Fun times. And typically, because I am a deeply corrupt person, the more moral indignation there is, the more attached to these two I become. WHOOPS. I regret nothing.

AHAHAHAHAHA. LOL. It's funny 'cause it's true. I used to feel bad for liking Damon/Elena, but then I got over it. xD

(Though I also love those weird moments where Elena is the one being manipulative and using Damon's tactics against him, like that time she passionately made out with Stefan deliberately in front of Damon LOL like whose benefit was that for, Elena? Not your boyfriend's.)

On my gleeful OMG DID SHE ACTUALLY JUST DO THAT scale, that scene ranks below only Elena's lustful bed-gazing in "The Last Dance." If you are using your boyfriend to incite jealousy in the man you supposedly hate, you may need to reexamine your position. Of course, discussion of Elena using her relationship with Stefan to punish Damon just makes me start to ponder how many times Damon has sat downstairs with a glass of bourbon and wallowed in masochism while Stefan and Elena have sex upstairs. Vampire hearing is a double-edged sword.

BUFFY: And I can fool Giles, and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason.

BUFFY: I can be alone with you here.

People honestly hate these? Philistines. I always thought they were extremely romantic, especially the last one.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Also, the term Tall Poppy Syndrome pleases me, since it is both apt and, according to Wikipedia, Australian. I shall assimilate it into my vocabulary.

:D Haha, yes, I do in fact live in Australia, so.

Which episode was this from, and how have I somehow missed it despite memorizing 95% of Damon's lines? WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY PRIORITIES? :O

It's from "Friday Night Bites"! Only one of my favorite D/E scenes EVAR. Seriously. But it does take place during the show's awful starting period, so I'll give you a pass. Just this once.

I used to feel bad for liking Damon/Elena, but then I got over it. xD

Aww. *pets you* I just... have this total inability to be ashamed, lol. When people get all up in arms about how unhealthy/wrong/whatever it is, I'm like: it's fiction, dude. Get over it.

If you are using your boyfriend to incite jealousy in the man you supposedly hate, you may need to reexamine your position.

LAWLS. Though I'm not sure Elena was deliberately trying to incite jealousy as such. I think she was just trying to spite him. Which... amounts to the same thing, but not in her head at that moment, lol. It's a great example of Elena inadvertently revealing the extent of her feelings for Damon while superficially 'proving' the opposite.

Of course, discussion of Elena using her relationship with Stefan to punish Damon just makes me start to ponder how many times Damon has sat downstairs with a glass of bourbon and wallowed in masochism while Stefan and Elena have sex upstairs. Vampire hearing is a double-edged sword.

SERIOUSLY. GAWD. That place must have been a fucking nightmare for the last however many weeks/months. And now I really want fic where Elena has sex with Stefan and gets off at the thought of Damon listening to them. Is that too much to ask, okay.

People honestly hate these? Philistines. I always thought they were extremely romantic, especially the last one.

No no, they hate the "Does it have to mean something?" Apparently it's too dismissive towards Spike.

[boot-the-grime.livejournal.com]

I have to say I was always indifferent to Kara/Lee... Maybe because I was never invested in Lee that much, or... I don't know. The only one of Kara's ships that I found interesting Kara/Leoben. And with this one I went from shipping them to going "No! It's wrong" (when New Caprica started) to "It's wrong but hot" (the paint sex dream) to shipping it in the sense of wanting to see them together on screen, but not wanting them to ever get together or anything... But the last thing I expected was for it to go out with a whimper. *sigh*

Other than that... I was far more invested in Baltar/Six (Baltar/Caprica, Baltar/Head Six and Caprica/Head Baltar, but also Baltar/Gina, so tragic...), Chief/Boomer, and Helo/Athena during the first two seasons (Athena is a character I started to hate in S4). I wasn't a huge Roslin/Adama shipper, but their relationship was dealt with much better than most of the show.

So... Baltar/Six, did you ship them?

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

Heh, I ship Baltar/Six like whoa, actually. I also ship Kara/Leoben like whoa. (And so much word on the lack of resolution there. So disappointing.) Apparently I ship everything like whoa. Except Roslin/Adama, which I started to find intolerable in season 4. Though, I did like them for the three seasons before that. *sigh*

HURT ME AGAIN

[aerintine.livejournal.com]

If you're questioning this choice…. I question your questioning.

No really. Do you even go here?

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA

I LOVE YOU SO EFFING MUCH.

Lee/Kara, Damon/Elena, Pete/Peggy, Buffy/Spike - I mean, how can you get it so right, so often? What are you? Are you a wizard? I think you must be a wizard.

I only left out Veronica/Logan b/c I've only seen 2 eps of VM ever

I didn't read through the comments so slap me if this one has already been taken: Hermione/Ron (because of course, who am I even) And yes, I know it's been weeks, but I'm being a snot-nose and demanding my meme NOW, dammit! :D:D

Re: HURT ME AGAIN

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

♥ ♥ ♥

Are you a wizard? I think you must be a wizard.

HAHA I LOVE HOW YOU SUPPORT MY DYSFUNCTION-LOVING WAYS.

You should totes watch more VM. We'd all be interested in your thoughts.

RON/HERMIONE! oh, man. NO IDEA. PERHAPS THE DAWN OF TIME?? This is gonna sound weird, but I think it might have been that moment in the Chamber of Secrets movie when they go in for the hug but then they're all NO. ABORT HUG. You are probably wondering why I'm picking a movie moment rather than a book moment, but that's because I didn't KNOW I shipped them so much until Rupert and Emma were all pretty together in my face? lol. Also that was before all the books were out, so when I read the rest of them I was all HNNNNGGGG OTP. And yeah, that's my cool story.

[pamsblau.livejournal.com]

So much LOVE for this post!!!!!♥

NO! Damon/Elena! What you mean they won't be the endgame? I heart them so much, man. Do you think it would be Stefan/Elena in the end or sth completely different? Maybe Damon/Elena/Stefan? That would be great!

It's like with Spike/Buffy. Deep inside I know that in the end they probably won't be together and God, it hurts so much but I can't stop loving he idea of them being together for elternity.

[ever-neutral.livejournal.com]

♥ !

Haha, I JUST CAN'T IMAGINE A D/E ENDGAME! Even though I &heart; them. D/E/S? Totally. The moral of the story is that everything ends in a threesome (or foursome). :) I guess with D/E, I just can't see them in a totally romantic light (unlike S/E). I'm more invested in their ~friendship more than anything, so I have very few expectations!